October 25th – “Treehouse of Horror XXII” (S23E03)

Opening:

22-1Homer sneaks away to eat the kids’ Halloween treats at Candy Eating Peak, where he falls into a crevice and is forced to chew off his own arm. Oh and before that he’s dressed up like Dr. Manhattan from Watchmen. Remember when these specials parodied classic horror stories instead of whatever movie happened to be popular that year? Yeah, I’m starting to forget, too.

The Diving Bell and the Butterball

22-5Completely paralyzed by a spider bite, Homer must learn how to communicate…by farting.

Well, I suppose we’ve hit a new low. When Homer started farting and Lisa began decoding his gas-passings into English, I got up from my computer, walked away, and made myself a drink before continuing. Let’s note that this happened around the 5-minute mark, before the opening credits had even finished. Also included in these first five minutes: a lingering shot of Marge’s cleavage, which as I’ve noted before, grosses me out.

Had this segment appeared, say, ten Treehouses earlier, it probably would have been enough for me to rethink this blog and decide to learn the guitar or something instead. These farts give me screams.

Oh, and the horror continues. Homer becomes some kind of stupid paralyzed Spider-man and farts on criminals. The word “ass-web” is used. The segment ends with a fart, and I’m not being figurative.

Memorable Gag: “My heart still beats and my brain still brains.”

Dial D for Diddily

22-4The voice of God implores Flanders to murder sinners in Springfield, but it turns out to be a prank by Homer, using poor Ned to take out his enemies.

I’ve started a lot of review blurbs here by saying “I’m not familiar with the source material.” This is a different case–I’ve seen tons of Dexter, but it wasn’t until a few minutes in–during a humorless parody of the Shotime drama’s opening credits–that I realized this was supposed to be a Dexter send-up. Dial D is barely a parody, provides no real jokes, and is weirdly mean-spirited. And this is a nitpick, but how many times are we going to do the “Dial _ for ____” title?

Memorable Gag: I smiled at the crazy cat lady selling “Barely Beagles”.

In the Na’vi

22-2Avatar parody.

I’ll give this segment the credit it deserves: the visuals are interesting, and the casting of Simpsons characters into Avatar roles is pretty inspired: Chalmers as the military villain, Skinner as his underling, Krusty as the leader of the operation, and Rigel 7 aliens instead of the Na’vi. I also enjoyed that they didn’t go with a hot alien girl in the Zoe Saldana role; the alien Bart gets into a romance with looks just like the others and has the same awful voice.

That all being said, nothing about this segment is funny or interesting to watch or Halloween-themed in the least. By tomorrow I expect to forget I ever watched it, just like I’ve forgotten that Avatar itself ever existed.

Also, hearing Bart Simpson say that he “got laid” disgusts me.

Memorable Gag: I’ve already forgotten this segment.

Ending:

22-3The cast gathers on-stage, imploring the viewer to spend too much money this Christmas and stimulate the economy.

Overall Thoughts:

Treehouse XXII is easily the worst Simpsons Halloween special of the first 22, and I really hope I don’t run into one worse than this. I’ve seen almost two dozen of these episodes in the last 25 days, but XII is the first one to not get a single laugh from me.

The farting first segment alone is one of the worst Simpsons things I’ve ever sat through, up there with that episode where Lady Gaga visits Springfield and sings a song with Lisa aboard her magical Gaga train. There is no reason to watch this; it isn’t even endearingly bad television, just irritating, embarrassing nonsense.

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